I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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