why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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