i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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