Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
