I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I had to cum in my sink.
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