ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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