At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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