small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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