his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize