I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Randomize
