I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
this will be a night to untag.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You've changed since you got that strap on
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
