theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Randomize