Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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