so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
