Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
