just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Randomize
