And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
how drunk are you?
Several
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
