i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Randomize
