You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
