Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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