My girlfriend figured out who you are.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
Randomize
