Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize