yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
