we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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