google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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