My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
