If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize