Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
