U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Randomize
