youre lurking in front of me
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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