belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I wannas sexs uuuuu
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
