I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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