How'd it feel making her break her religion?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
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