Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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