Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
