My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
