you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
