She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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