i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Randomize