Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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