There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
Randomize