Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Randomize
