I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Randomize
