she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
