why didn't you poke me back
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
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