He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
