Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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