Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
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