conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
