Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Shame - the story of my life.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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