I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
the condom got lost in my hair
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Randomize
